Recommended Reading
Every book we recommend in our articles, grouped by how well the evidence supports it.
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Every book here appeared in one of our articles, where we cite the research behind the topic. The evidence rating describes how well the book's own claims are supported by studies we could find: Strong means well-replicated findings, Moderate means mixed or partly tested, Low means the book rests on the author's interviews, observation, or argument. The rating is not a rating of how good the writing is.
Evidence rating: Strong
The Grieving Brain
Mary-Frances O'Connor, PhD · HarperOne, 2022
Evidence rating: StrongO'Connor runs a grief research lab and writes about her own field without overselling it, which is rarer than it should be. The core idea, that grief is your brain slowly updating a model built around someone's presence, does more explanatory work than any stage model. She is also clear about where the neuroscience is suggestive rather than settled.
Discussed in: Most People Say Heartbreak Made Them Stronger. The Research Is Less Sure.
Evidence rating: Moderate
Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make and Keep Friends
Marisa G. Franco, PhD, psychologist · G.P. Putnam's Sons, 2022
Evidence rating: ModerateThis book answers the hesitation that stops most people from starting: the fear of being the one who reaches out. Franco draws on published friendship and attachment research and turns it into practical habits. It is a popular book, so it simplifies some studies, and the evidence behind individual tips varies. Skip it if you already reach out easily and want only the academic literature, which the sources below cover.
Discussed in: How to Rebuild Your Social Circle After It Shrinks.
The Secret Life of the Grown-up Brain: The Surprising Talents of the Middle-Aged Mind
Barbara Strauch, longtime health and science editor at the New York Times · Penguin Books, 2011 paperback
Evidence rating: ModerateBased on the Seattle study findings described above, Strauch reports on research suggesting the middle aged brain keeps some strengths. Our Moderate rating is for reading a journalist's summary of studies as a way to understand this research: it points you to the science but is not itself a study, and the book predates much of the work cited here. Skip it if you want current data on speed and memory decline, or if you prefer to read the papers directly.
Discussed in: Your Brain at 50: What Slows Down and What Keeps Growing.
Spark: The Revolutionary New Science of Exercise and the Brain
John J. Ratey, MD, with Eric Hagerman · Little, Brown Spark, 2013 (paperback)
Evidence rating: ModerateOur rating is for regular exercise as a way to support thinking skills: the Northey review and the Erickson trial are positive, while the Cochrane review found no cognitive benefit, so we stop at Moderate. This is a popular book for general readers, not a trial, and some of its claims go further than the studies above. Skip it if you already exercise regularly and want the primary research, or if you would rather read the trials listed below directly.
Discussed in: Does Exercise Protect Your Brain? What the Trials Show.
Quiet Your Mind and Get to Sleep
Colleen E. Carney and Rachel Manber · New Harbinger Publications, 2009
Evidence rating: ModeratePublisher and retailer descriptions say this workbook applies cognitive behavioral therapy to insomnia, including insomnia alongside anxiety, depression, or chronic pain. We rate the behavior, structured CBT for insomnia, as Moderate, in line with the moderate quality evidence behind the ACP recommendation. We did not review trials of this specific book. Skip it if you suspect sleep apnea or another medical cause, if your insomnia is severe, or if you would rather work with a clinician in person; see your doctor first in those cases.
Discussed in: Six Hours of Sleep in Midlife: What the Research Does and Does Not Show.
Redirect: Changing the Stories We Live By
Timothy D. Wilson, social psychologist · Little, Brown Spark, 2015 (paperback)
Evidence rating: ModerateWilson wrote the book on story editing, so it explains the studies in this section. We rate the behavior, reinterpreting a setback with a structured prompt, as Moderate: randomized trials support it, mostly with students. Skip it if you want a workbook of exercises, since the book mainly explains the research.
Discussed in: How Rewriting Your Story May Change How You Feel.
Nudge: The Final Edition
Richard H. Thaler and Cass R. Sunstein · Penguin Books, 2021
Evidence rating: ModerateBased on the findings above, one way to act on them is to read how the authors describe defaults and choice architecture, then apply the ideas to your own setup. Our rating covers the behavior of designing your environment around inertia, which has workplace evidence from the studies above but that we could not check beyond employer plans. Skip it if you want a step by step budgeting manual; the book explains the thinking and leaves the setup to you.
Discussed in: How to Nudge Yourself Into Better Financial Decisions.
The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
John Gottman, PhD and Nan Silver · Harmony, revised edition
Evidence rating: ModerateWe are recommending this with the prediction claims set aside. The practical material, on repair attempts, on turning toward your partner in small moments, on distinguishing solvable problems from perpetual ones, is genuinely useful and reflects decades of close observation of couples. Read it as an experienced clinician's practice manual, which it is, rather than as a predictive science, which it is not. Skip the accuracy statistics when you reach them.
Discussed in: The Famous Divorce Prediction Does Not Predict Divorce.
Evidence rating: Low
The Great Good Place
Ray Oldenburg, sociologist · Berkshire Publishing Group, 2023 edition (first published 1989)
Evidence rating: LowThis book gives the clearest account of why repeated, unplanned contact matters, which is the gap the AARP religious attendance figure points to. It is a work of observation and argument, not a controlled study, so it shows no measured effect on loneliness. Skip it if you want data; read it if you want a framework for choosing where to spend your time.
Discussed in: Why Your Late Forties Are the Loneliest Stretch for Adults Over 45; What the Evidence Says About Third Places, and How to Find One.
Working Identity: Unconventional Strategies for Reinventing Your Career
Herminia Ibarra, professor of organizational behavior · Harvard Business Review Press, updated edition, 2023
Evidence rating: LowIt speaks to the stuck feeling directly: it argues that identity changes through small experiments and new contacts, not through an early master plan. We rate it Low because it rests on the author's interviews and observation, and we found no controlled test of its method. Skip it if you want a step by step workbook, or if your change is forced and urgent, where practical job search help may serve you better.
Discussed in: Why Career Change Feels Like Losing Something, Even When You Want It; Changing Careers After 45: What the Research Says Helps; From Stuck to Moving: A Six Week Plan Built on Career Change Research.
Quit: The Power of Knowing When to Walk Away
Annie Duke · Portfolio, 2022
Evidence rating: LowBased on the findings above, one way to act is to decide in advance what would make you leave. The publisher's description says Duke covers sunk cost bias, status quo bias, quitting contracts, kill criteria and premortems. We rate the behavior of setting exit criteria in advance Low: the studies above describe the biases, but we did not review trials showing that this practice improves career outcomes. Skip it if you already have a clear exit plan, or if you prefer a coach or mentor to a book.
Discussed in: How to Make Career Decisions When Everything Feels Risky.
Co-Intelligence: Living and Working with AI
Ethan Mollick, Associate Professor at the Wharton School · Portfolio, 2024
Evidence rating: LowWe rate the behavior of practicing with AI tools in your own work Low. The productivity study above supports it only for customer support agents, and it found little benefit for experienced workers. The book is a trade title and has not been tested as an intervention. Skip it if you already use AI tools daily, or if you want peer reviewed evidence for a specific industry.
Discussed in: What the Research Says About AI and Your Career After 40.
Ikigai: The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life
Hector Garcia and Francesc Miralles · Penguin Life, 2017
Evidence rating: LowWe are listing this because it is the book that carried the mislabelled diagram to a global audience, and readers deserve to know that before they buy it. It is a pleasant, readable travelogue with interviews from Ogimi in Okinawa. It is not research, the Venn diagram in it is not Japanese, and the longevity claims rest on the demography discussed above. Buy it as a travel book if that appeals. Do not buy it as evidence.
Discussed in: The Ikigai Chart You Have Seen Is Not Japanese.
Your Future Self: How to Make Tomorrow Better Today
Hal Hershfield, behavioral scientist and professor at UCLA · Little, Brown Spark, 2023
Evidence rating: LowThe author co-wrote the virtual reality study above, and the book applies his research on future self continuity to saving, health and exercise. Our Low rating covers the behavior it teaches, because the supporting experiments we read were short lab tasks. Skip it if you already save through automatic payroll contributions, or if you want a retirement planning manual, since this is a general book about decisions, not a guide to accounts or investments.
Discussed in: Why Retirement Planning Feels So Hard, and What the Research Says Helps.
Thinking, Fast and Slow
Daniel Kahneman, Nobel laureate in economic sciences · Farrar, Straus and Giroux, 2013 (paperback)
Evidence rating: LowBased on the history above, one way to learn the original researchers' view is to read a book by one of them; this one is Kahneman's general audience account of how people make judgments and decisions. We rate the behavior of reading a book to improve money decisions as Low, because we know of no trial showing that it changes decisions, and because this edition predates every study in the debate we describe below. Skip it if you want the current state of the loss aversion argument; the papers in the sources list are the better route.
Discussed in: Do Losses Hurt Twice as Much as Gains? The Evidence Is Messier Than the Slogan.
Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love
Sue Johnson, EdD, developer of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy · Little, Brown Spark, 2008
Evidence rating: LowThe book applies attachment ideas to couples through seven conversations and practical exercises. We rate it Low because we could not verify trial evidence for the book itself, and we could not rate any title Strong. Treat it as a way to get language and prompts for talking with a partner. Skip it if you are single, if you want a research summary, or if your relationship involves fear or abuse, where a trained professional is a better first step.
Discussed in: Your Attachment Patterns Matter in Close Relationships, and They Can Shift.
Option B
Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant · Knopf, 2017
Evidence rating: LowWe are including this one with a warning, because it is the book people are most often handed after a loss. It is a memoir with research woven through it, and Grant is a real researcher, but the resilience literature it draws on is exactly the literature this article has just explained is shakier than it looks. Read it for the account of one person's year, which is honest and useful. Do not read it as evidence about what happens to you.
Discussed in: Most People Say Heartbreak Made Them Stronger. The Research Is Less Sure.